TV Recap: Don't Trust the B in Apt. 23 - "The Seven Year Bitch..."

Left to right: Eric Andre, Ray Ford,
Dreama Walker, and Michael Blaiklock

Welcome to the TV Recap column for the ABC comedy Don't Trust the B---- in Apt. 23. Every Wednesday, I will be bringing you a recap of the most recent episode as well as personal insight into why I find the characters to be an infectious version of what 2 Broke Girls wishes it was. So please join me for a fun season as we deal with the bitch, the Beek, and June as they get into wacky adventures. Also, make sure to check out my column for Family Tree (Thursdays) right here on Optigrab.

Left to right: Krysten Ritter and James Van Der Beek

With little doubt, one of the biggest highlights week-to-week is the relationship that Chloe (Krysten Ritter) shares with James Van Der Beek. At times it makes no sense, but there is this mysterious bond that doesn't quite match any other relationship. They appear to relatively be jerks to one another, but that doesn't stop them from going places and having fun. That is why approaching "the Seven Year Bitch" is kind of a fascinating experiment of tearing them apart in order to understand everything.

The episode begins with Chloe and Van Der Beek bumping into apartment 23 while doing a row of insults at each other. With June (Dreama Walker) sitting on the couch in pajamas, they begin to make fun of her clothing. Soon it is revealed that Van Der Beek has been dating this woman named Emily (Meg Chambers Steedle) and considers her almost perfect. They decide to go out to dinner with Emily at a restaurant that Chloe is banned from. Almost immediately, Chloe vetoes Van Der Beek's right to date her.

Why is this? During their long relationship, they have shared the communal power to veto each other's relationships. Van Der Beek kept Chloe from dating Jeff Gordon, and now Chloe was returning the favor. This comes off as sort of an insult, though it leaves Chloe feeling satisfied. That is until it is discovered that Van Der Beek continued to see Emily without telling her. This throws her into a moral peril. 

She tries to replace Van Der Beek in the only way that she knows how. She talks to June through insults, which don't work out. She even dates another actor named Beckett Everett (Ryan Windish) in order to fill that hole. But things go south as Chloe become more and more trapped in a Beekless world. Van Der Beek is doing fine. He is cooking and having a fun time with his girlfriend. However, Chloe is now reduced to working at Gloss Mobile, which happened after she went to pay her phone bill but ended up yelling at people and somehow getting a job.

It shows June and Luther (Ray Ford), who consider this her rock bottom. Mark (Eric Andre) doesn't quite get it, as Chloe's trajectory sounds normal. However, Eli (Michael Blaiklock) shows up to state that he saw something odd at his art show: Van Der Beek, who has somehow put on massive weight in two days. He seems happy, but everyone is concerned about the poor man.

When Chloe shows up, they refuse to acknowledge each other, as they each have reached a new low in their lives. It tears apart June to the point that she decides that seeing them just drift through life without a personality is too much. She gives a barrage of insults to each of them in order to trigger their memory. Soon, they begin talking and they realize that they miss each other. Van Der Beek is able to dump Emily without remorse, as she dated him during his fat period and it would be hard to come back from that.

Rating: 4 out of 5

There is much that I enjoyed about this episode. While I felt the third act's premise was established on broad and unfunny concepts, it was nice to have a Chloe-centric episode that didn't feel too reliant on her being a jerk for the entire episode. In fact, like all good Chloe episodes, this is about her crucial necessities to survive. Nothing would fit that bill more than James Van Der Beek. For as long as there's been a show, there's been these two rambling around town together making wisecracks. 

It even helped to make the Luther and June relationship a little stronger. If there was someone who won the episode, I would have to say Luther. His involvement in making Van Der Beek happy is a constant, but to watch him face the ordeal of everyone's happiness is sort of funny. From his comment about his arms being back scratchers to the great running gag of staring into the camera, Luther owned the episode with poise by just being shocked. His whole rant involving a tornado and a banana stand is so absurd that it works. Even the way he says "funny" has a nice ring to it. 

Of course, that isn't to say that Luther is the hero. June is, if just because she cannot stand to see her friends torn apart. She starts off the episode sort of baffled by this behavior, then slowly embraces it. While I feel that this continuity reset every episode does drag down the show, it is hidden under some brilliant techniques regarding satire and the way that a scene is filmed. The running gag of staring into the camera works both as humor and also as a slow reveal. There is enough suspense that the payoffs work, even if the fat suit humor wasn't quite all there (even though it could be nitpicked too much to assume that the Norbit reference was foreshadowing it). And for once, Chloe's anger with everyone didn't so much damage the episode as it just made her seem more sympathetic. When insulting Beckett, she is upset that he doesn't understand jokes. It is also great to see Mark back in a substantial role, if just to argue that he sees nothing wrong with Chloe taking on actual responsibilities. I even like that Eli got to have some story where he wasn't just being weird from his apartment window. That alone gives a pass to the whole butter statue-making stuff. It was bizarre, but it just seemed like a waste of butter.

The logic of this series' universe is fascinating, if just because for a lot of the time, nobody seems to be working. While it is accepted that Chloe doesn't really have a career, June doesn't seem to be talk about work post-Just Beans outside of a few episodes. The only one who really talks about it is Van Der Beek, though it could largely be because of how it impacts the character. This week, he tries to get into a Spike Lee movie and doesn't. It's kind of a bummer, as I wish a story line would develop involving a movie that would be as time consuming as the Dancing with the Stars plot. Maybe even a surprise cameo from a popular director? I could write fan fiction about Van Der Beek's film career of a season three that never will be.

This may not be the strongest episode as a whole, but it continues to impress me how each and every episode is somehow able to work on its own. The satire manages to not only be surface level with broad humor, but it is starting to help establish characters better. Chloe may be at times borderline caricature, but the reason that she works is because there's something there to always ground her in almost a character study sort of way. The only real complaint is that Mark and June don't seem to do much of anything despite that big leap many, many episodes ago. It is the one small frustration that I have with this show.

Otherwise, I am bummed to know that tomorrow will be my last recap for the series unless I decide to ever do season one. It has filled me with joy to see this show week-to-week and not just purge it out like most viewers probably did. I would hate to live in a Beekless world. But alas, that time is quickly approaching. To that, I say veto! Also, I really hope we can get Robin back for  one more episode. She was criminally underrated.