Before I dive into my retrospective of Freakazoid, I would like to thank everyone who has read my recaps, and I look forward to doing more in 2013. While I am an absolute fan of the show, I will admit that there was a lot of clunky filler scattered throughout the series (predominantly in the first season). In trying to figure out what those moments were, I have collected 15 particular things that just annoyed me. While the list simmers into controversial territory in the bottom section, it is still the moments in the show where I groaned and demanded something more, like whatever it is that Freakazoid and friends were doing without these people.
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| 1. Lawn Gnomes |
They only had one appearance in "Lawn Gnomes Chapter IV: Fun in the Sun," but with that piece of terrible filler, the show introduced the least appealing thing imaginable. The Lawn Gnomes may come from a place of familiar comedy (they steal stuff), but the way that it was executed is just pithy and uninspired. The segment was intended to be an origin story, and one that dragged for its short run time. I am glad that this did not continue, because it would have managed to flat line a great show that barely found its voice towards the end of the second season.
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| 2. Fatman and Boy Blubber |
Time has not been kind to the chubby nerds of yesteryear. Where Comic Con has given this demographic a place to be embraced, this show almost contradicts its own desire to be the ultimate nerd cartoon by making characters who: 1. Had obese pun names that ripped off Batman, 2. Couldn't complete a segment without turning into a fight over food, 3. Had running gags about easily being tired and fat. I could go in depth for why this is a bad portrayal of fat people, especially in regards to the audience: children, but I think that the fact that they don't do anything but lame, obvious gags doesn't give them much of a purpose. It is more of an insult that this show tried to pass these off as credible characters that actually insulted the health condition of the nerds who would like it.
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| 3. The Huntsman |
What does he do? He clearly has stated that he wanted to do something. In his own segments, the joke is: Huntsman walks into the police station. Officer says crime is down. Huntsman finds crime. The end. There is literally no joke there, and they did this scenario TWICE. Also, in the classic episode "The Freakazoid," he complains AGAIN about not having any crime to fight. However, when Freakazoid has to take absence for the Lobe's sake, the Huntsman doesn't do anything. However, he is capable of helping Cosgrove serve food at the celebration at the end of the episode. I mean, for an ambitious character, there seems to be no purpose. He either solves crime in an anticlimactic way, or he doesn't take the lead when he has the chance. This character is just another form of contradictions that could have been better.
4. Bonjour Lobey
This may be the first controversial choice on the list. "Bonjour Lobey," a parody of Hello Dolly is a five minute song implanted into an episode and goes nowhere. At best, it has given me a reason to talk like Louis Armstrong to my cats. Otherwise, the segment goes on too long, adds nothing to the plot, and halfway through, the original impact of the joke is lost. It almost kills a decent segment ("Dexter's Date") and leaves no room for a proper episode ending.
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| 5. Mo-Ron |
There is no issue with the show wanting to add an extraterrestrial character into the mix. It almost seemed like a staple for any show that had a "Steven Spielberg presents" card over its title. Still, Mo-Ron is as dumb as they get. He scratches his belly button and can only say "I am Mo-Ron." This is fine in small doses, but he controls most of the episode and the gag is that Bill Clinton is upset. Who'd blame him? At least his reintroduction as Bo-Ron in "Next Time, Phone Ahead" proved to be somewhat more fruitful. Still, as far as satire for dumb aliens go, this is one of the worst.
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| 6. Toby Danger |
Maybe my lack of Johnny Bravo knowledge keeps me from giving this segment more credit. It isn't terrible and in fact has a lot of great gags involving flying cement. However, the rest of the tone is irksome, as it tries to be a Johnny Bravo knock-off with these big sight gags that just feel awkward. I wouldn't be too offended it there were more created that justified this bizarre addition to the series (including different animation style), but it just never feels like a good inductee into the series. It does seem to be a nice precursor to Venture Brothers, though.
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| 7. Fan Boy |
I am impressed with what they didn't do with Fan Boy. While he was a whacked out Star Trek and TRON obsessive, he rarely played the insulting cards like Fatman and Boy Blubber did. Still, his character was obsessive and most of his stories involved somehow annoying Freakazoid with super fandom. He knew everything, and it came across as annoying. However, as the show continued on, his smaller appearance in the show did benefit my thoughts on him. He was used sparingly, so the jokes didn't sting as much. Still, this felt like the borderline between real nerds and a caricature of nerds that would have watched the show. At very least, we can thank him for working Mark Hamill into an episode somehow.
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| 8. Giving Cosgrove a Heart |
I love Cosgrove, but he is more of a misunderstood side character. He is meant to come on and make us laugh. By giving him an entire episode with a girlfriend, it kind of broke that rule and made him seem awkwardly vulnerable. It also felt too intrusive for the series to focus on more than Freakazoid and Steff's relationship. While Cosgrove's relationship was for naught, it sucked the comedy out of the show and while Freakazoid is a great character, he is nothing without misunderstood Cosgrove, not the lovelorn version. Also, it almost seems to break the tough guy image that makes his jokes so great in the first place.
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| 9. Where’s Freakagirl? |
In the opening episode, we were promised some Freakagirl. I know that the writers had trouble working her into the show, but I felt like this could have gone somewhere. Sure, by season two, Freakazoid had Professor Jones, Cosgrove, and Roddy MacStew rotating, but it almost felt wrong to introduce a character that could have served as the perfect alternative. Okay, I am more using this spot to speculate what could have been. The show may have been stuffed, but I still wish Freakagirl was around for an episode or two, if just to make a coherent Batman parody of Yvonne Craig's Batgirl.
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| 10. Arms Akimbo |
There's a reason that this villain only made it in one episode. His long, broad arms knocking stuff over wasn't a long lasting joke. Sure, they managed to milk it to the final gag, but when thinking about villains, he is one of the worst. He is more of a pathetic nuisance than a villain when you think about it. His Oops Insurance policies were also pretty stupid.
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| 11. Handman |
Starts off a decent gag, but when it reaches the climax of the episode, it goes a little too far. Freakazoid apparently has a Handwoman as well, and then his feet bicker. This is more of an example of the show going for the biggest, most outrageous gag, and only getting too redundant. Also, the segment almost made me feel like Freakazoid was going to be schizophrenic in some way. It was just too weird.
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| 12. Gutierrez |
Not necessarily a terrible villain, but an overused one. His stories evolved from the logical arc of "The Chip" to the mundane "The Wrath of Gutierrez." Through his multiple appearances, he had a very basic sense of humor that involved breaking the fourth wall and getting agitated by the word "weenie." The results are very hit and miss, but at times, he is indistinguishable to the Lobe, which serves as a major problem. Gutierrez is a fine character, though probably the most unfairly used throughout the entire series. It was cool to have Ricardo Montalban as an enemy, but that joke only goes so far.
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| 13. The Lobe |
The other overused character is the Lobe. He has done a lot of great episodes (see: "The Freakazoid,""Relax-O-Vision"), but why was he the fall to villain? He was in the most episodes and seemed to be the dominant villain. Sure, he was a mad genius, but after awhile, his plans being foiled became obvious and even his reliance on other villains towards the end is only testament to how I feel. This show had a great supporting cast, and to put the Lobe in every other episode did not help to reflect the other characters' potential.
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| 14. Roddy MacStew |
Don't get me wrong, I like hearing Craig Ferguson do a Scottish accent. It just seemed as the series went along, Roddy MacStew went from an essential character to a pointless one, namely because of Professor Jones. Soon his roster of Scottish gags just didn't fly and his chemistry with Cosgrove has been trumped by Jones. He is fine in smaller roles, but it is unfortunate that he quickly became a supporting character to the supporting characters. He still manages to tell a good joke, but after awhile, he just felt like clutter in a series that was establishing great characters.
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| 15. Steff |
Imagine if Freakazoid's relationship went anywhere. True, Steff got some juicy moments towards the end, but for the most part, she remained unsung. She was brought on to make jokes about how pathetic Freakazoid's schemes were. There was good comedy moments, but we never got to know Steff as anything more than a joke. Even Cosgrove's brief relationship had more emotional intensity than what came of the pairing. I guess this could have been solved with a season three, but it is too late to wish for that. All we have now is a character whose potential was so strong, and it was only beginning to be realized by the end.
Come back tomorrow for my 15 Favorite Aspects of Freakazoid.
Also check out more of my work at http://nerdseyeviewpodcast.blogspot.com/ where I have a podcast called Nerd's Eye View.
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