Hello and welcome to TV Rewind, a series that will explore the shows of yesteryear and dissect them one episode at a time. My goal is to explore lesser known programs that you may not be aware existed. For my first series, I have chosen Freakazoid!, a beloved cartoon that ran on the WB from 1995-1997 and made for some weird, Animaniacs-style parodies of the superhero genre. I will attempt to give you the goods every weekend, just like the actual show. While I may not do it every week, make sure to look out for double headers in which I review episodes on Saturday and Sunday.
Two Against Freak
It is almost like the series met my request the past few episodes on the account that we're seeing some villains team up in clever and interesting ways. While "the Island of Dr. Mystico" saw everyone stuck on an island, we see the return of Cave Guy (Jeff Bennett) and Cobra Queen (Tress MacNeille), both of whom are criminally underused on the show (though not as much as Longhorn at this point). The only question now is if they will do good in what seems to be predominantly Cosgrove (Ed Asner) and Roddy MacStew (Craig Ferguson) episode.
The episode begins with the Narrator (Joe Leahy) giving a warning for tonight's episode. It is non-graphic and has nothing that will offend anyone. He ends the bulletin by stating that the kids should get the parents to come out and have a nice bowl of cereal and a cruller. This leads right into a Cops parody called "Real Life Police," which changes the popular theme song to "Nasty, nasty, nasty, nasty men" (sung by Dorian Harewood). After a montage detailing how the show works (people get arrested and learn a trait in jail), the episode begins with Cosgrove detailing what goes into these procedures.
Suddenly, Cosgrove hears about a robbery that is taking place. Grabbing a club, he parks the car and runs down an alley, over a fence, and a little ways down to the house. By this point, he tells the camera operator who is recording him to come closer. However, he is blue in the face and passes out. When the camera pops back on, Cosgrove is talking directly to the robber and demanding that he take the TV back into the house. After that, he demands that he plugs the wires in properly. It's amazing how Cosgrove can do nothing physical and still get everyone to obey him.
On a nearby rooftop, Cave Guy sees this and is relieved to know that one of his problems is out of the way. He runs into the sewers, where he meets Cobra Queen. He states that everything is ready for the big heist that they plan to pull off. Cobra Queen is just upset that Cave Guy didn't notice her new Japanese lanterns (nice continuity from "Sewer or Later").
Meanwhile, MacStew is teaching Freakazoid (Paul Rugg) how to use telekinesis by lifting a brick into the air. It proves to be a struggle, often having Freakazoid cry and have the brick hit him in the head. MacStew claims that this is for his benefit to grow as a superhero, though also to possibly help the show, which may have gotten a second season, but is still ran by fickle people. Suddenly, Freakazoid hits the brick against his head so hard that it splits and he goes into shock, only being able to finish his sentences with the word "brick."
MacStew tries to shake him of the shock, as they need to be security at the exhibit for the Diamond Hats of the Czars. Freakazoid manages to show up, but he is still earpy and unable to think properly. When Cave Guy, Cobra Queen and her snake show up, MacStew demands that Freakazoid fight them off. He ends up using his telekinesis to lift the glass off of the hat that they want to steal and place the cover over him. Cave Guy steals the hat and says "Oh look, freak in a glass."
After this, Freakazoid is quickly rushed to the Numnum Memorial Hospital where he is forced to stay. The doctor prescribes that he will be fine, but needs to stay rested. Cosgrove and MacStew decide to team up. Their first thought is that they will need to travel into the sewer, which leads to a discussion on if it should be called poo water or crud water. Crud water wins.
However, Cave Guy and Cobra Queen have decided to hide the hat in an abandoned carnival called Uncle Buzzy's Funland. After doing so, Cave Guy and Cobra Queen go out on a date where they seem to be hitting it off.
Back in the sewer, MacStew and Cosgrove come across a note from the Narrator attached to a ladder. The note says to follow the ladder up to the surface, where the hat is. He goes on to note that Freakazoid may not like when he spoils the plot, but he doesn't care. The Narrator decides to interrupt the episode only to complain that he won't say what the important announcement he wanted to say was because he feels that Freakazoid will yell at him again.
When they get to Uncle Buzzy's Funland, they notice that Cobra Queen's snake is patrolling the grounds. Cosgrove suggests that they hide in the little teacups, which he always liked. However, this is inopportune because there is no aerial cover and quickly becomes a problem. Cosgrove ends up trying to beat the snake with his club. It quickly makes the news, where Freakazoid watches it from his room. During this time, he discovers that he is able to use levitation to refill the glass of water that the nurse gave him. In fact, this makes me enthused enough to go out and rescue his friends.
When he arrives at the carnival, he first confuses the snake into forming loops with its body and then causing it to tie a knot. Once he does that, he uses telekinesis to mess with Cave Guy and Cobra Queen. He moves the hat onto the top of a nearby roller coaster, which the two climb on top of, not sure why he made this game so easy. Freakazoid ends up taking a nearby track car and chasing them across the terrain until he gets the hat and tires them out. They fall off of the track and into bats of caramel-like substances. They are arrested and the hat is returned back to the museum.
The episode ends with Cosgrove giving an unceremonious goodbye to the film crew from "Real Life Police" and the two villains being carted away while flattering each other. MacStew and Freakazoid are talking about the achievement that he has had with telekinesis and that he can only use it when he's angry. Cosgrove suggests that they go to a showing of a large cowboy fringed vest, which they need to hurry to because seating is limited. The episode ends with the "Nasty men" song playing behind them as they walk away.
Rating: 3.5 out of 5
I will admit that I am confused on how I feel about Cosgrove leading Freakazoid episodes. While he definitely had a lot of wit (thanks to the Cops parody), he still is supposed to be the sidekick of the show. However, when you team him up with Professor Jones or in this week's episode Roddy MacStew, you do get an interesting dynamic. I feel that Cosgrove and MacStew, however, are more flawed than his other pairings because they both almost serve as mentor figures to Freakazoid and therefore never display dominance above the other. It is fine, but you don't ever get gags as inspired as scaring Jones or going to random places (which makes a welcome return in this episode). Instead, they just bicker about how the Narrator is padding out his part (which is great) and that Cosgrove is bad at finding hiding places.
I also don't know how to feel about the telekinesis running gag. While I enjoy the meta humor of Freakazoid talking about getting a second season, it is still kind of odd. He is disabled because he cannot levitate things and that somehow takes him out of most of the episode. His penchant zaniness is gone for half of this episode, which luckily gives the supporting cast time to shine, but you kind of wish that he wasn't knocked out by something as minuscule as a brick.
However, everything almost worked out for the sole purpose of Cave Guy and Cobra Queen. I would imagine that in season three, they would become the married couple of the show and fight crime as a team. Their choice to spend most of the episode pitching woo was another odd choice that worked for the time being, but may lead to problems similar to what Cosgrove had when he fell in love.
It also works because Cave Guy clearly is not amused by Cobra Queen's snake and finds her method of fighting bad. There is a whole couples therapy plot that could be developed from the segments seen in this episode of them laughing and plotting their revenge.
I also must admit that I found the running scenes in this episode to be a little bizarre. It feels more focused and fluid than in the past, where the background somehow doesn't move until it needs to. It actually makes for an interesting dynamic and makes the episode have its own unique construct. When Cosgrove is running down the alley, it doesn't feel like a Freakazoid scene, but I guess that it could work in favor of the "Real Life Police" world that they were building. However, when Cave Guy does it later, it just feels odd, but may have been done just for continuity.
I must admit that I love Cosgrove and this is a good episode with him, but I just don't know how I feel about taking out Freakazoid and making Roddy MacStew a prominent figure. He was great in "the Chip" episodes, but he just doesn't carry an episode with the ease of his counterparts. At very least, this would have been an interesting chance to create the spin-off for Cosgrove and Professor Jones. There just needs to be a dynamic to the duo, and I felt that MacStew was too much like Cosgrove for that to effectively work.
Here's hoping that we get one last great episode of Longhorn in the last two episodes. If we can establish a love between Cave Guy and Cobra Queen, then we need to establish something odd about Longhorn. He is such a great character.
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