Hello and welcome to TV Rewind, a series that will explore the shows of yesteryear and dissect them one episode at a time. My goal is to explore lesser known programs that you may not be aware existed. For my first series, I have chosen Freakazoid!, a beloved cartoon that ran on the WB from 1995-1997 and made for some weird, Animaniacs-style parodies of the superhero genre. I will attempt to give you the goods every weekend, just like the actual show. While I may not do it every week, make sure to look out for double headers in which I review episodes on Saturday and Sunday.
As shown above, this opening focuses on Steff (Tracey Rowe) getting forced into a corner by a big blob of puss. She is rightfully scared, and is screaming for help. When Freakazoid (Paul Rugg) comes to save the day, he makes quick sweet talk before facing the blob down. Suddenly, the blob sneezes and the goo gets all over Freakazoid. At this point, Freakazoid is disgusted and walks away, saying "I quit!" Steff is left pissed and saying "My Hero," as the blob fills the screen.
A nice opening and a nice take on the less seen Freakazoid/Steff relationship that has been developing in this series. We get the cowardice charm of Freakazoid in one quick swoop while also getting a satirical take on a creature that is clearly inspired by the Blob. The key element being that Freakazoid says "I quit" puts the final peril into a great comical perspective.
Rating: 4 out of 5
Relax-O-Vision
For those wondering how Scream-O-Vision could ever be topped, this is the episode for you. The episode begins like most episodes of the Green Hornet: Freakazoid walks into a warehouse full of boxes and gets into a fight with ninjas. We don't actually see the fight, but it cuts to a peaceful scenery while Percy Faith's "Theme from a Summer's Place" plays in the background. We don't actually go back to that scene.
Instead, we head over to another figurehead. This time it is H.A. Futterman (Ben Stein) talking in the familiar monotone dull voice. He is explaining the reasoning behind Relax-O-Vision, which is simply a tool to censor violence. Every time a violent scene comes up, it will cut to "Theme from a Summer's Place" and peaceful imagery will accompany it. It is meant to soothe the viewer and take their mind off of the chaos. Another nice joke is that Futterman is spoken to from many camera angles. The gag is that it keeps cutting to an awkward corner and he has to turn his chair to face it. This is an excellent touch and getting Ben Stein to be the dull voice of wisdom is always a nice touch.
While the episode is listed as "Relax-O-Vision," the actual segment is called "Terror on the Midway." This begins with Freakazoid at a kissing booth at a county fair. From the looks of it, he is in cahoots with Steff and is making a lot of cash (reportedly $200) off of this routine. However, Freakazoid's lips are a little sore from puckering up so much, so he decides to take a break. Along with Steff, they begin going for a walk. When Freakazoid goes out to get frozen bananas and leaves Steff alone, lo and behold, but the Lobe (David Warner) is there to kidnap her. He leaves a note and Freakazoid is on the mission.
But first, we get a visit from good old Cosgrove (Ed Asner) who has a two-for-one coupon for the mud baths. Freakazoid joins him, and we see the first and only time that Cosgrove takes his shirt off revealing a very hairy chest, along with surprisingly buff Freakazoid pectorals. During this time of relaxation, Cosgrove talks about the note that Freakazoid received and that Steff is being held at the Smithsonian Institution at the Hall of Nasty Objects.
All of the bad guys are there, including Longhorn (Maurice LaMarche), Cobra Queen (Tress MacNeille), Cave Guy and Kid Carrion (both Jeff Bennett), and of course the Lobe, who has Steff attached to a rocket ship. The sequence is a brilliant satire of TV censorship as it uses the Relax-O-Vision gratuitously and almost every time Freakazoid faces an opponent. Statues fall, cannons go off, and Freakazoid even claims that the animation for one of the fights cost them the entire budget for the season. So meta and so great, if just because we have no idea what is going on. We see the wreckage, but are presented with calming pictures beforehand.
When the big battle happens, it is between the Lobe and Freakazoid, which is simply a move of switching the tied bodies so that the Lobe is attached to the rocket. He gets catapulted into space, where things blow up. It has a very Independence Day, fireworks going off feel to it. The Lobe is foiled and Steff and Freakazoid get a kiss in, but not without the Relax-O-Vision butting in again.
The segment ends with Freakazoid in Futterman's office, a little annoyed by the Relax-O-Vision. He decides to beat him up, which results in the final use of Relax-O-Vision. Congratulation, you found something more hilarious and poignant than Scream-O-Vision, and it was only made better by gratuitous usage.
This is the show at its best. Not only does it manage to satirize the superhero genre, but it also features a delightful send-up of TV censorship. While it mostly attacks violence, there is some hint at "adult" situations when Steff and Freakazoid kiss at the end. This may go down as one of my favorite examples of censorship that manages to get the point across while being uproariously hilarious and to the point. You could say that they used Relax-O-Vision to death, but if you have seen enough edited-for-TV movies, you will surely enjoy every second of this.My favorite moment was when Relax-O-Vision who cut to a group of cattle on a field and one of them was rubbing his face in the dirt. So adorable.
Rating: 5 out of 5
Fatman and Boy Blubber
Another side character in the Freakazoid universe. This time, it is the Batman parody Fatman and Boy Blubber (not to be mistaken with the Kevin Smith podcast Fatman on Batman), including a very cheesy rendition of the opening credits to the 60's TV show. The very idea of obese superheroes is already a very low concept and the only way to do this correctly would be to give them dignity. Make them the heroes of some crime instead of a serious of physical gut moving jokes.
The episode begins with a bully named Joey (Scott Menville) intimidating Louis (Scott McAfee), who is overweight. Joey insists that Louis doesn't need the lunch money because he should be on a diet. Suddenly, Fatman (Marc Drotman) and Boy Blubber (Paul Rugg) show up to solve everything, or sort of.
They manage to scare Joey away, but this results in a very elaborate chase. Fatman reveals just how handicapped he is by jumping over a bike rail and breaking a bar off of the jungle gym. They never catch Joey, but they claim that he will never return.
They return to cheer up Louis, who is not convinced that they did anything substantial. Fatman goes into a long diatribe of how hard it is to keep a diet and that they lose track of time, thus eating junk food. Suddenly, he decides to try and steal food from Louis. Along with Boy Blubber, they begin fighting him on a quest to get the food. This is how the segment.
This isn't the worst that they could do. In fact, they almost seemed to try and give the characters dignity towards the middle by focusing on how hard it is to lose weight. This is a nice change of pace from the rest of the episode, which sees fat people failing miserably. Where is the humor in there besides cheap shots? While it has jokes, they seem to be all very insulting of fat people and in no way paint them in a good light. They are more fleshed out than the Huntsman, but still manage to lack the creativity and fun that his pointless sketches (correct, more than one) do. I really hope this is the end of the fat stereotype characters, because they are terribly contrived. At least Fan Boy has a plethora of knowledge to substitute for his shortcomings.
Rating: 1.5 out of 5
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Limbo Lock-Up
I have no idea what this episode was supposed to be about. It opens up with Freakazoid in what is probably the internet jumping around like Daffy Duck. He is going crazy and is even making faces. Suddenly, the IP: Idiot Police (Jeff Bennett) are there to arrest him for being really crazy. Again, I have no idea how this was set-up, but I am willing to go with it.
The Idiot Police carry Freakazoid to a court room where he the Judge (Frank Welker) gives him an option for his sentence. Either he serves time in jail, or spends 30 minutes listening to Fan Boy (Stephen Furst) ramble on about how Tron didn't bankrupt Disney. He blames the Black Hole and Something Wicked This Way Comes. Freakazoid can't handle it and ends up going to jail anyways.
While in jail, it turns out that his cellmate is Fan Boy, who is continuing on his long rant about Tron not bankrupting Disney. This drives him so insane that he asks the audience to call the Huntsman. This is the closest to date that we have had crossover for any characters. True, Freakazoid interrupted the video about the Gnomes, but never did they feel like they were in the same universe. This was kind of interesting, even though it was a godawful choice to call for.
This segment is short and kind of sweet. Fan Boy is not quite at the point of annoyance yet, and you actually learn something by listening to him. He really is a nerd and I am glad that he is used to drop random trivia into the show. I still worry that he will be pushed into a caricature of the nerd model, but for now, he is all right. However, because this episode lacked really any semblance, it feels incomplete and a little too weird to be one of the greats.
Rating: 3 out of 5
Terror Palace
Of all characters to bring back, why can't we see the glorious return of Lord Bravery? He is a character with a lot of promise. The Huntsman (Jeff Bennett) makes his second appearance in as many episodes and we have to sit through the long title sequence and hear his origin (sung by Jim Cummings). There is nothing brief about this character and if he is used again, I demand a shorter intro video. We don't need to hear about how he saved a chunky gnome from a crow. We just don't.
In this episode, someone sounds the Horn of Urgency that sends the Huntsman to headquarters, where he talks to Lt. Artie King (Dorian Harewood). He is wondering what crime there is to fight. King claims that it was a false alarm and that there is nothing going on. This sends Huntsman into a rage and demands that there is crime to face. He storms out, kicking stuff, and is seen fighting someone as they jimmy open a safe. Cue credits.
Man, I am getting sick of this character, if just because he lacks any real point. I would rather see another Toby Danger video than sit through this tripe again. There is no punchline other than there is no crime going on. Huntsman talks to King, says he's going to leave, and fights crime. It is almost simpler than a one strip comic. However, there is no punchline and it sure lacks personality in every sense. It really reminds me why I perceptibly hated the side stories on this show. This may not be the worst, but it is more annoying knowing that they don't seem to be trying for anything but filler with this guy.
Bring back Lord Bravery, please.
Rating: 1 out of 5
Overall Rating: 3 out of 5
It is a shame that these episodes have to be rated lower because they have terrible side stories blended in. Like I have said before, "Relax-O-Vision" may be one of the most meta and hilarious commentaries on censorship. It doesn't need to be overly complicated, and by using calming pictures, it shifts tone so quickly that by the time it becomes gratuitous, the joke works better and better. It is also a nice touch getting Ben Stein to attribute his voice to this episode. He may be a gag in most things, but here he is effectively dull in making a dull concept sound... dull.
I love that segment, and paired with the opening, it represents Freakazoid at its best. It never takes itself too seriously and always has a sense of nerd culture mixed in. While it has been awhile since we had a Justice League reference, that is fine. I am beginning to love the villains, notably Longhorn and the Lobe. We need more Cave Guy, as he seems a little flat right now. Still, after the amazing "Hot Rods from Heck" segment last time, Longhorn is one of my favorites, and his "fight" sequence was the best.
It is the rest that tore this episode down. "Limbo Lock-Up" wasn't the worst thing that the show could do, but of the rest of the show, it was apt. At best, it serves as a good parody of an insane cellmate who is drawn crazier by having a more obsessive and chatty mouth. This segment is fine, though could have done with a more fleshed out story.
Then, there is the rest. I will start with the Huntsman. Am I missing the point? Why does this character exist? He is terrible. I hate him. He ruins every episode and his beats haven't changed one bit. Also, that theme song is fine, but when the segment is so brief, it feels pointless and eats up too much time. Please, just axe this character and bring back Lord Bravery. At least he was a fun character to listen to. It is not like the voice of Bravery is too far. Jeff Bennett has been in almost every episode so far.
Then there is Fatman and Boy Blubber. Besides being a terribly lazy pun, they are just pointless characters. I like that they try and give them dignity by giving them a moral code, but it falls apart into fat jokes. This is such a terrible idea and contributes to the stereotype division of the show being some of the worst. Maybe my bias against fat jokes is keeping me from liking these characters even a little, but still, there is more to mine from this tripe than fat kids bullying over food.
And of course, Cosgrove is back to talk about mud baths. I love how he tries to be a hero only to sidetrack the story. He hasn't gotten into the funny one liners just yet, but hopefully soon, we'll get him talking nonsense and you'll understand why I love me some Cosgrove.
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